When in doubt...

¹doubt

 verb \ˈdau̇t\

transitive verb

1

archaic

a : fear

b : suspect

2

: to be in doubt about <he doubts everyone's word>

3

a : to lack confidence in : distrust <find myself doubting him even when I know that he is honest — H. L. Mencken>

b : to consider unlikely <I doubt if I can go>

We have it every day about something, someone, an emotion, a decision we have to make.  How do we get past this doubt that creeps into our life constantly?  Do we trust our gut? our heart? our friend's advice? Our U.S. currency says, "In God We Trust".  The latter is probably the best choice when it comes to BIG things.  But what about the little things?  Like Skinny Wraps!  Cross Fit!  Aging Cream!  Energy Drinks!  Are they fads?  Do you REALLY get results or is is just a scam?

Friends, if there is one thing I've learned in the past years of my crazy 100mph life, it is dont' stress over the little things!  When in doubt- TRY IT!  What's worse, the annoyance of doubt that lingers in your head and gut, causing you to wonder if your are missing out on something that everyone else is enjoying?  OR the pain of taking the step of CHANGE- try it and finding out it doesn't work for you.  Nothing lost, nothing gained, but you don't bask in doubt anymore.  It's really that simple.  Worse case scenario, you wrap and don't get results.  You try cross-fit and you don't like it.  You smear aging cream on your face and still have age spots.  Or you drink 8 oz of orange flavored "energy" and you don't feel energetic.  No more questions.  You just got the answer all by yourself!  Why are we so skeptical?  We naturally resist change and we could be missing out on something that could improve our health, make us happy, or make life easier and more enjoyable.  I'll opt for positive changes any day any time!  

It's ok to be the blue fish.  But, be the blue fish because you tried something new and it wasn't for you.  Don't be the blue fish because you are the only one who has resisted a SMALL option in life that everyone else seems to be enjoying!  

We have to make so many decisions on a daily basis.  Some are life changing that effect a lot of factors- our family, our friends, our job, our income.  Other decisions are tiny tiny tiny.  This blog is about the tiny stuff.  For the BIG stuff go with the USA currency suggestion! 

I'd love to hear from you!  Are you a blue fish because of doubt?  

There is doubt and there is truth.  Discover it! 

G

Disappointment

Life is full of disappointments.  When we think about disappointment we generally go to an experience where someone, or something has created disappointment for us.  We go through emotions of anger, sadness, and possibly regret.  Disappointment is a moment (or several) in time where we have to adjust to the realization that our expectations were not met. 

Disappointments can be BIG: interviewing for a job and not getting the position, a break up in a relationship, our children breaking the rules, preparing for a competition or performance and bombing it, or stepping on the scale after a week of serious dieting to see the scale hasn't moved.

Disappointments can be SMALL: the movie or book didn't end the way you hoped, the food at a restaurant you just ate wasn't very tasty or the new pair of shoes you just bought hurts your feet.


We eventually get over our daily disappointments as time heals all wounds.  Some of us dwell on these let downs a little longer than others, but it does pass.

I want to share another kind of disappointment, one that truly affected me this past week.  How about being the one responsible for inflicting disappointment on another?  This hit me hard and took much more time, thought and effort to accept and get past.

I've been working for 24 Hour Fitness for 4 years now as a Group Fitness Instructor.  I take my job seriously and am passionate about each and every 60 minutes I deliver to my students.  This past Monday, I forgot about a class I was supposed to sub.  I was a no-show!  In 4 years I have NEVER made this mistake.  My manager calls me 15 minutes after the class was supposed to have started to inquire my where abouts.  I was completely honest with her and told her I had failed to record the class on my calendar.  She called the gym manager back to officially cancel the class.  A trickle of disappointment occurred from my fitness manager, to the club manager, to the students who showed up for a class and didn't get the workout they had planned for.

I beat myself up over my careless, irresponsible actions.  I was sick to my stomach all day.  I can't believe I did this.  This is not like me.  I worried about what actions would take place regarding my job.  I expected a harsh reprimand and a mark against me in my official file.

Hours later, after a long day of self-loathing I went to teach my regular Monday night 5:30pm Zumba class.  To my surprise my fitness manager was there.  This is not a typical Monday for her to be at this gym at this time, especially in my class.  My heart sunk, my gut wrenched, and I started breathing hard- why was she here?  I said a quick prayer that she would not release me in front of my students and take over the class then and there.

To my total astonishment, she was there to award me!  I had been chosen as the group fitness instructor of the quarter among all the instructors at several surrounding 24 Hour gyms as the Tune Belt winner for demonstrating good ethics, great instruction to my students, subbing for my peers and always being there willing to help when I can!  Always being there except earlier that day to sub for a class!  OMG, I barely got through the class and all I could think about is the irony of my no-show actions on the day I am to be rewarded for being responsible!

I spent the latter part of the evening with my husband and good friends basking in self-pity.  Each one of them told me to get over myself, that it was an honest mistake, and that I should be basking in pride for the award.

Two days later I spoke with my manager, once again groveling with apologies for my actions.  She told me that my no-show actions were NOT characteristic of my consistent professional and passionate work that I have demonstrated from the beginning and to not worry about it.  That simple.




We are our worst critic, right?  All that time I spent sick at my stomach, and worried about keeping my job over a minor infraction.  I should have known better.  Lesson learned.  We are human.  We make mistakes.  One moment in time does not define us.

Stressed OUT!

This morning I get up at 6:45am.  I was awoken by a bad dream.  One that reoccurs over and over for me.  I head down stairs to make the coffee and find last night's dinner dishes in the sink and covering the counter.  I had forgotten to run the dishwasher earlier the day before so my cycle was off for the dishware.  I begin to unload the dishwasher so I can load last night's mess.  Coffee is done.  As I'm pouring my coffee I see a drip of water coming from the cabinets above, higher, higher... the water is coming through the ceiling where I guesstimate is the kids bathtub on the 2nd floor.  Call the husband in a panic.  I get instructions to turn off the water in the garage.  My dear husband walks me through that process which turned out to be pretty easy, but stressed me out tremendously when he told me I needed to do it immediately. 

"MOM, come here quick!"  I run upstairs to find one of my boys leaning over the toilet.  "I feel like I'm going to throw up".  I stroke his back and comfort him.  The door bell rings.  It's the plumber.  I pat my boy on the head and comfort him that I'll be right back.  The plumber comes in, looks around for 5 minutes and leaves.  I get my son settled on the couch with a Disney show turned on and a bucket in is lap.  Call hubby back to give report and play 20 questions.  Hubby decides plumbers report is not adequate and needs to leave work to come home and take care of it. 

I scramble to get all of the dishes out of the cabinet in case the water damage causes it to break away from the wall.  I tell my little girl, "You won't be taking a shower this morning, go get dressed and look as clean as you can."  Time to walk out the door for school.  Nope... I have 3 lunches to pack.  Husband calls back with 20 more questions in transit on the way home with a statement that really pushes me over the edge, "you'll have to go to the gym and shower before you head to the airport". Oh yeah, I'm supposed to be at the airport in 2 hours to head home to Texas for a family funeral........As far as I'm concerned, an earthquake might as well have taken my whole house down.  These little incidents felt that BIG to me. 

Stress.  A lot of it.  I feel like I'm going to crack sometimes, more than sometimes and I'd like to run away from home.  I get head aches.  I get nausea.  I have night sweats.  I'm tired.  This is pretty typical for me.  But not near as bad as it was 18 months ago.  In August of 2011 I was diagnosed with General Anxiety Disorder (GAD).  I never have heard of it, but I was/am a text book case. 

Stated from an article by the University of Michigan  Psychiatry department, "Generalized Anxiety Disorder occurs when you feel worried and stressed about many everyday events and activities. Often the things you are worried about are small or not important. This type of worry disrupts your life most days. Everyone gets worried or anxious sometimes, but people with generalized anxiety disorder experience more than normal everyday worries." 

Symptoms are:

• Feeling tired or irritable; having a hard time concentrating.
• Having headaches or muscle aches.
• Having a hard time swallowing.
• Feeling shaky; sweating or having hot flashes.
• Feeling light headed, sick to your stomach, or out of breath.
• Having to go to the bathroom often.
• Feeling like you can't relax; being startled easily.
• Having problems falling or staying asleep.

To read more on this article Click here.

Women are twice as likely to have this disorder as men.  If you are feeling these symptoms and have for a quite some time- GO TO YOUR DOCTOR!  Many women suffer from this problem and I'm here to tell you ladies- it's real!  GAD can be treated.  Get help if you need it and admit you have a problem if you do.  Life is so much more enjoyable and clearer when you learn how to control the stress. 

I'm happy to say kids made it to school on time with lunches.  The throw up symptoms were a false alarm for my son.  Plumbers came back to discuss with my husband man to man.  I made it to the gym for a shower.  AND, I made my flight.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is admit that we aren't well and we need help.  One of the best things to happen to me was having a medical reason why I couldn't seem to handle life.  My husband is amazing and understanding now to my sensitivities and I manage day to day by putting one foot in front of the other.  One of the biggest solutions for me was reducing the stress I could control.  There are things we stress about that we can control and things we stress about out of our control.  Don't waste time on the little things.  If you have GAD, you have to learn how to manage your stress- it can be done, but don't try to do it yourself.  Go to your Doctor and ask about GAD if you think you are suffering with this disorder.

AND most importantly know- you are not alone!

G

Super Bowl Party Food- good eats!

The most watched television event of the year is today.  Who is tuning in?  Raised in Texas, you might say I'm a HUGE football fan.  We Texans do everything BIG and football is no exception.  You might even say that my passion for being a fitness instructor all started with football.  Yes, dancing to burn calories and stay fit allows me to be the cheerleader and dance team girl from the 80's who never wanted to let go of my glory days!  

I do have to admit though that I am more of a college football fan than NFL (Go Texas Tech!  My dog's name is Red Raider).  Don't get me started on our society's problems with paying professional athletes millions of dollars while our public teachers, firemen, policemen and military men and women get paid pennies.  THAT will be another blog on another day.


Now, even though I'm not an NFL fan, I will be watching Super Bowl XLVII for the commercials and the half-time show.  C'mon Beyonce, don't let me down like Madonna last year.  I'm counting on you for some new dance moves and inspiration!  


Along with billion's of other people I will be indulging in some "snacky food" today.  Super Bowl Sunday is the second-biggest food holiday in the US, behind Thanksgiving.  It's a booming weekend for the most popular foods: namely wings, chips and pizza.  An estimated 1.2 billion chicken wings will be consumed this Super Bowl Sunday, according to the Washington-based National Chicken Council.  (sited from www.csmonitor.com)  My husband just walked in the door from Costco with 10lbs of wings!  We are definitely contributing to the statistic today.  

So, what is on my menu?  Food that is actually not so high in calories and has some nutritional value!  

Hansen's Super Bowl Menu
Wings- baked not fried
Celery with natural peanut butter
Sugar snap peas
Broccoli with low cal ranch
Roasted potatoes
Popcorn- cooked on the stove with 1 Tbs of oil...and my BIG splurge of the day is butter on the popcorn!

According to some fun facts I found on the 93.1 Kiss FM of El Passo, TX radio station http://kisselpaso.com/super-bowl-fun-facts/ your average calorie intake during the game is about 1,200 calories!  Of course, you could burn that off doing about 3 hours of intense Zumba! Some other fun facts:

• 6 percent of Americans call in sick the Monday after Super Bowl.

• On the Monday after the Super Bowl, antacid sales increase by 20 percent.

• Pizza sales go up 35 percent the day of the Super Bowl.

• 8 million pounds of guacamole will be consumed on Super Bowl Sunday.

• 14,500 tons of chips will be eaten along with that guacamole.

• Dips and spreads are top choice for food to eat during the Super Bowl (at 30 percent) followed by chicken wings (22 percent), pizza (17 percent), chips and salty snacks (14 percent), and burgers and hot dogs (9 percent).

• Super Bowl fans spend more than $50 million on food during the four days prior to the super bowl.

• Super Bowl Sunday is the biggest winter grilling day of the year.

• More than 49 million cases of beer will be purchased. The Super Bowl is the seventh most popular “beer holiday,” behind July 4th, Memorial Day, Labor Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas and Halloween.

• More drivers are involved in alcohol-related accidents on Super Bowl Sunday than any other day of the year except St. Patrick’s Day.

• The Super Bowl is the second largest day of food consumption behind Thanksgiving.

• You would need about 13,333 NFL linemen (at 300 pounds each) to balance the four-million pounds of fat consumed from potato chips on Super Bowl Sunday.

• The average number of people at a Super Bowl party is 17.

• 5 percent of Americans will watch the game alone.

• Super Bowl weekend is the slowest weekend of the year for weddings.

• 1.5 million TVs are sold the week before the Super Bowl.

Enjoy your Super Bowl Day!  Go Green Bay! 

G

Smiling is contagious!

My senior quote in my year book stated: "If you see someone without a smile, give them one of yours."  What's the chance you are not going to get one back?  Smiling is contagious.  A smile is so powerful you can entice a stranger who you know nothing about to send one back to you.  Have you ever been having a really bad day and someone randomly smiles at you and your heart feels a little warm?  It's a positive energy we can send outwardly or take in.  

“It only takes a split second to smile and forget, yet to someone that needed it, it can last a lifetime. We should all smile more often.” ― Steve Maraboli

Bare with me- this blog is full of quotes because they make me smile! AND, they might make you think about smiling more often.

Smiling is a sign of kindness, happiness, approval and amusement.  People who see you smile are attracted to you.  They want to get to know you and spend more time with you because your smile is a positive energy that make others want more.  A very consistent compliment I get from my students while teaching is, "I just love your smile, it make the class so much more enjoyable".  

"Here's to the people who always have a smile on their face and no matter what they're going through, they put others before them."

Did you know that smiling can improve your health?!  Here are a few reasons to smile according to Dr.  Mark Stibich with About.com


Smiling Relieves Stress
Stress can really show up in our faces. Smiling helps to prevent us from looking tired, worn down, and overwhelmed. When you are stressed, take time to put on a smile. The stress should be reduced and you'll be better able to take action.

Smiling Boosts Your Immune System
Smiling helps the immune system to work better. When you smile, immune function improves possibly because you are more relaxed. Prevent the flu and colds by smiling.

Smiling Lowers Your Blood Pressure
When you smile, there is a measurable reduction in your blood pressure. Give it a try if you have a blood pressure monitor at home. Sit for a few minutes, take a reading. Then smile for a minute and take another reading while still smiling. Do you notice a difference?

Smiling Releases Endorphins, Natural Pain Killers and Serotonin
Studies have shown that smiling releases endorphins, natural pain killers, and serotonin. Together these three make us feel good. 
Smiling is a natural drug.

Smiling Lifts the Face and Makes You Look Younger
The muscles we use to smile lift the face, making a person appear younger. Don't go for a face lift, just try smiling your way through the day -- you'll look younger and feel better.

Now I ask you- don't you want to reduce your stress, boost your immune system and look younger?  And if those aren't reasons enough, how about just helping someone have a nice day?

"Smile, it is the key that fits the lock to everybody's heart."

G

Mirror Mirror On The Wall

Me legs are too big.  My butt is saggy.  My arms arms are flabby.  My stomach is poochy.  My face is pudgy.  I have two chins.  I have cankles.  I have thunder thighs.  I have a muffin top.  I have a double chin.  AND... 

Sound familiar?  Are you guilty of claiming any of these?  Have these exact words come out of your mouth?  Women have severe issues with their self-image.  We are all guilty of spending more time disliking our bodies than appreciating our assets.  

self–im·age

 noun \ˈself-ˈi-mij\

: one's conception of oneself or of one's role

What we see, or think we see in the mirror is not necessarily what others see.  A study found that women overestimate the size of their hips by 16% and their waists by 25%, yet the same women were able to correctly estimate the width of a box.  I believe we have warped minds and I don't necessarily know how it works.  In high-school I was athletic, very active and wore a size 8.  At 5'2" that's NOT the perfect size.  In college the freshman 15lb was more like the freshman 50lb for me.  I've been able to maintain a size 2-4 for the past 12 years (not including pregnancies) yet I still look in the mirror and see thunder thighs, professional football player calves and thick arms.  My incredible husband tells me EVERYDAY how beautiful I am and that he loves my legs.  Obviously I don't see what he does, but I'm glad he feels that way.

I don't want my daughter having these issues and I know I set an example for her.  She hears every word that comes out of my mouth and she internalizes them.  It's important to me that my daughter loves herself and sees a beautiful young lady in the mirror when she stands in front of it.  So, if I expect her to believe this, then I need to get over my own issues and stop putting myself down.  How do I accomplish this impossible feat?  To start, we all need to realize it's NOT IMPOSSIBLE, it just takes effort.  Remember the children's book The Little Engine that Could?  "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!  

MedicineNet.com experts suggest the following steps to improve your self-image.  

1. Stop negative self-talk immediately. While you still may not like what you see in the mirror, Martz says, learning to describe yourself with neutral, objective phrases can help stop the cycle of poor self-esteem. So, instead of saying to yourself "I have really ugly thighs," think "My thighs could use some work."
2. Find and focus on the things you like about your looks. It's best not to link your looks to your self-esteem, but with body image so intimately entwined with self-image, that can be hard to do. The next best thing is to find something about your image you really like. "It can be great hair, great nails, terrific teeth. Find the things about yourself you can say something good about, and every time you look in the mirror, go there first and say something positive to yourself," says Martz.
3. Treat yourself with the same kindness and respect you show your best friend. "Would you respect and care about a person who says about you what you are saying about yourself? If the answer is no, then begin treating yourself at least as well as you are treating others in your life," says May.
4. Say what you mean. Sometimes, hating your thighs is all about wanting thinner thighs. But sometimes, Kaufman says, negative body thoughts are a way of expressing discontent over other issues in your life. Learn to decode these messages, she says.
5. Dress the part. If you're putting off buying new clothes until you like your body better -- don't. Whether you're bursting at the seams in duds that are too tight or swimming in oversized clothing to hide your body, you are eroding your self-esteem. "Buy what fits you, and look the very best you can. It sends a powerful message to yourself that you are worth it," says Aronowitz.
6. Recognize that people naturally come in different shapes and sizes, and cherish your body's uniqueness. And, Martz says, remember this: "Only 2% of the world's women fall into the supermodel category. That leaves a lot of room for the rest of us!

To the 98% of us real women, I would like to share a quote with you I learned at a very early age from my incredible, beautiful, wise mother: "Pretty is as pretty does".  

G

Learn to say "NO"!

After a crazy, busy, exhausting week I find myself on this Sunday morning wanting to do NOTHING! 

Wed- prepare for house guest and pick up at the airport
Thurs- taught 2 classes, delivered cupcakes to school and went out for my sons' birthday dinner celebration
Fri- Lunch with a friend at 11:30am, 3 hours of Zumba to fight Diabetes on Friday night
Sat- CXWORX launch on Sat am which required a LOT of choreography studying, a private Zumbatomic birthday party for a precious 9 year old girl on Saturday afternoon... AND I hosted my twin boys' sleepover birthday party Sat night

I look back on the stress, lack of sleep, and shortness of temper and find thoughts in my "think cloud" consisting of "Why do I do this to myself?"  I think I can do it all, but really, it wears on me and my family suffers, the ones that mean the most to me.  A dear friend of mine told me once, "Every time you say yes to someone, you are saying 'no' to your family.  This is a good lesson to learn, if I could just apply it!  

In an article by Power to Change ministries they state:
"There’s a simple way to sum up the fall out of excessive busyness. The things that are important — our health, our souls, our relationships — are put aside for what is immediate and urgent. The things that demand our attention NOW receive more attention than the things that matter most to us. Demanding people, last minute requests, intrusive phone calls, guilt-laden responses to others’ appeals keep us constantly reacting and concentrating on surviving rather than truly living."  (Read more of the article at Tips for Women Who Juggle too Much)

What do I really want?  To survive?  Or to LIVE!  I want to live!  But... I want to live life at it's fullest why helping others.  The balancing act is hard.  Bottom line is I don't need to put others needs in front of my own family's needs and my own person well being. 

In summary, from the above article "Saying no is often a matter of passing by the good for the sake of the best. It’s also a matter of admitting that we’re not indispensable and that others can do things for themselves."  

Easy to agree, but difficult to follow.  Who is with me for trying to say "NO" every once in awhile?  

G

The List

How many of you start your day reviewing or making THE LIST? Is it on your phone, in your planner, on the white board, a tablet, or the paper pad that has a magnet on the back that you get out of the $1 bin at Target and hangs on your refrigerator?  

To do list:

What’s on it?  Are you at the top?  You should be!

If I asked you why you are NOT on the list….you would give me another list of priorities that come before YOU.  The kids, the house, the errands, the laundry, ...just not enough time in the day.  

Well, if Momma ain't happy then nobody is happy.  If this is true, then why wouldn't we want to take the time and make the effort to help ourselves be happier and put ME at the top of the list?  Taking the time to care for your health will in return create a happier, healthier momma, with a higher self-esteem.  If you don't need to lose weight, you can still benefit greatly from exercise and raise the happiness meter.  

Benefits of Exercise

Manages your weight

Increases energy

Increased self-esteem

Increased mental focus

Decrease risk of heart attack

Decrease risk of osteoporosis

Reduce depression (production of endorphins (feel good hormones)

Decrease stress level

Improve sleep

Increase sexual drive

If you could improve in some or all of these areas would you be happier?  Fast forward 20 years from now….if your children were copying your current lifestyle choices/habits how would you feel?  Could you pat yourself on the back for setting the example of the choices they make?  How are their self-esteem?  

So the next question is HOW? How do I put myself at the top of the list when there are so many other things to take care of?  I feel guilty taking time for myself.  Sound familiar?  

 1) Accept that you deserve to be happy and understand that you are an example of what your kids will follow.  2) Each and everyday, put yourself at the top of the list.  Stop feeling guilty about doing this for “yourself”, because it’s for YOUR KIDS (or loved ones).  4) Engage in family activities- hiking, biking, sledding, swimming.  5) Find a buddy so that you can motivate each other to commit to a schedule or program.  

If a look into the future of your child(ren) doesn’t motivate you nor does being healthier and happier for yourself or loved ones, then maybe here's one last way to look into the mirror and consider putting yourself at the top of the list: 

1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

What will be at the top of tomorrow's list?

G